Do I look like an addict?

In Ontario 42,000 addicts need 42,000 urine samples performed week after week

“But why must I give you a urine sample?” I asked the receptionist at the marijuana clinic. She replied, “Because we won’t see you without one, and each time you come back you must give us one. It’s to make sure you’re not taking illegal drugs.”

So at 94 years of age, a doctor with lots of gray hair, tired after fighting Toronto traffic, and walking with a cane, I asked her, “Do I really look like an addict?” I reluctantly gave her a urine sample! But why was I there?

Years ago, while in Japan, I had a Japanese massage at the Imperial Hotel in Tokyo. During the procedure, a petite girl suddenly struck a heavy blow on the side of my head for no apparent reason. I swear to High Heaven I did not pinch her, nor commit any ungentlemanly act. But the blow injured the ulnar nerve in my hand and resulted in chronic neck pain later in life. I’ve never forgotten her.

I’ve done what many readers with chronic pain do. I’ve exercised to strengthen neck muscles, undergone massage, physiotherapy, acupuncture, and chiropractic treatment. For years I’ve refused prescription painkillers. Readers well know I believe they’re overused. But at one point a University clinic prescribed morphine. That only put me to sleep.

I should add, I’ve been seen by several neurosurgeons in Boston, Toronto and one in Israel whom I had interviewed about spinal injuries. They all concluded I was not a candidate for surgery as MRIs failed to show a specific lesion. So much for the accuracy of MRIs!

Now, like many patients and physicians, I’ve discovered that chronic pain is not easy to diagnose and treat. Consequently, I work at the computer with an inflatable neck cuff around my neck, which helps.

Now, with some reluctance, I’ve decided to try medical cannabis (marijuana). But what a waste of taxpayers’ money to demand a urine test on every visit I make, because some people cheat. But this is a minor expense compared to the cheating that occurs at addiction clinics.

The best example I know is that in Ontario, just one Canadian province, 42,000 addicts are being treated with methadone. I repeat 42,000! This means that 42,000 addicts need 42,000 urine samples performed week after week at assembly-line addiction clinics to make sure they’re not cheating and taking illegal drugs. It’s costing taxpayers millions and millions of dollars. It’s also making doctors who run these assembly-line factories very rich.

What all this means is that good old-fashioned horse sense is as extinct as the dodo bird. As a journalist, I spend many days in the U.S. every year so I have a Nexus Pass. This means I’ve been interviewed by Canadian and U.S. immigration officials to ensure I have no criminal record. I’ve also been photographed and fingerprinted. But the clinic doesn’t give a tinker’s damn I have a Nexus Pass. I must still provide a needless urine specimen.

Today, with a health care system that desperately needs money, we need to get tough on cheaters. Why couldn’t addiction clinics just do random urine checks on addicts? If caught cheating, send them to northern Canada to chop wood. It would quickly cure their addiction. I mentioned this idea months ago. Tons of angry readers agreed with me.

So why don’t we do random urine checks in marijuana clinics? If I were caught cheating, I too need to be given a ticket to a well-wooded area in northern Canada.

I told the clinic doctor I was not interested in getting high on weed, nor did I want to smoke it. So I’ve been prescribed oral cannabis drops. They contain the CBD component of cannabis that only provides pain relief. I’ll keep you informed of my progress. But I believe it will require a few weeks to evaluate the result.

I fear another idiocy will occur after cannabis is legal in Canada. I will still have to attend a clinic to obtain medical cannabis. But I will be able to buy recreational cannabis at any legal outlet, get high on it, drive a car, and kill someone. So, will it also be possible for me to obtain medical cannabis at these legal outlets?

Online For comments

Just Posted

Expansions rolling ahead at Red Deer Hospice

Six new rooms will provide care to 100 additional residents each year

Red Deer RCMP warn public about online job scams

Red Deer man applied for a construction job and was asked a fee to process his application

Smiles Thru Lindsey Foundation hosting a drive-in movie fundraiser

Excitement building as the big event draws closer

Central Alberta Buccaneers come up short against Monarchs

Bucs’ lose star quarterback in heartbreaking affair

Ellis Bird Farm hosts annual Bug Jamboree

Visitors enjoyed getting up close and personal with butterflies, beetles and bees

WATCH: Red Deer College honours Pride Week by raising a flag

Pride Week festivities run all week long

Lacombe Council passes second reading of cannabis bylaw

Public hearing sees opposition to bylaw; third reading coming Sept. 10th

UPDATED: Cars plunge in Italian highway bridge collapse; 25 killed

Five more people are injured and in serious condition

Court hearing on Humboldt Broncos fundraising to test Saskatchewan law

The money has yet to be distributed because Saskatchewan has legislation known as the Informal Public Appeals Act

Fredericton police release scene of shooting spree, but ‘damage’ remains

Residents of a Fredericton apartment complex may not be able to return home just yet

Bus crash in Ecuador kills 23 people, injures 14

The bus hit another vehicle in an area known as dead man’s curve on Tuesday

Trump and Omarosa spar over claim he used N-word

Manigault Newman continues promoting her White House tell-all and releasing secret audio recordings

Man plows truck into Houses of Parliament in London

UK police treat Parliament crash as terrorism, man arrested

Gun used in Fredericton killings is legal, man had licence

Police Chief Leanne Fitch said the long gun is commonly available for purchase, and is not a prohibited or restricted weapon

Most Read