Years back, I always said I would never become my mother

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Growing up I always said I would never become my mother, especially during those attitude-filled and defiant teenage years. It’s funny to look back and think that I was so adamant about this statement that I so often reminded myself of – especially when I was getting in trouble!

Now, at almost 30, I am more like my mother, Lynda, than ever. And if I do say so myself, I’m actually quite proud of it.

With Mother’s Day coming up this Sunday, it has really given me a chance to reflect on my relationship with my mom and truly realize how lucky I am as a daughter to have someone help guide me through my childhood and adolescent years and keep me on the straight and narrow. Or maybe more so, how lucky I am to have someone put up with me – you could look at it either way!

My mom has helped to shape me into the person that I am and without her, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I feel extremely fortunate.

When I was younger I always thought that my mom was too strict, that I was deprived because our friends were allowed to do things we weren’t, they were allowed to stay out longer than me (I was the only one with a curfew, and an early one at that!) My friends were also often allowed to sleep over at each other’s houses or attend house parties even when there were no parents around. I think it goes without saying that I was obviously not, and probably for good reason.

Of course looking back my mom was protective and had good reason for it — something that took a little maturing on my part to understand.

Now, this woman who I thought was so protective and unnecessarily sheltering of me is more than just my mom, she is my friend. We talk several times a day. She gives me advice about things and is sometimes the voice of reason when I’m stressing out about something. We go to the movies, go shopping and do lunch. I couldn’t imagine my life without my mom.

Mother’s Day to me is not about the flowers, cards or gifts – although it goes without saying that these things are so much fun to give. But truly, Mother’s Day is about appreciating the woman who raised you, loved you unconditionally, took the time to teach you from right or wrong and to instill strong values in you.

I think Mother’s Day is one of the most important holidays of the year and it should be celebrated more than just once every 12 months. After all, a mother’s job is one of the hardest things in life and I think that should be recognized.

Now, as I enter the period in my life where I am ready to get married and to have children, I can see myself becoming even more like my mother – being protective, disciplinary and loving all at the same time.

In reflecting on how my mom raised me, it really is all about balance.

I have to laugh now because my boyfriend often jokes that I give him a look like my mom does or that I’m going to be the strict one once we have children and he’ll be the fun dad that the kids love. And honestly he couldn’t be more right! Actually to be honest, I wouldn’t want it any other way.

My mom is such a strong, selfless and loving woman and I can only hope to be half the woman she is.

efawcett@reddeerexpress.com

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