A few ‘tiring’ things in sports

  • May. 29, 2013 7:15 p.m.

There are a lot of things which make me tired these days.

A large meal, especially around holiday time, staying up later than 11 p.m., although that time seems to be creeping closer to 10 p.m. and watching the parliamentary channel for more than a minute.

There are also plenty of things I’m tired of and in no particular order, here they are.

New York Rangers coach John Tortorella – he’s mad at his players, he’s mad at the other teams’ players, he’s made at the coach of the other team, he’s mad at the officials and he’s mad at the media for asking “stupid” questions. John, don’t go away mad, just go away. Maybe take a trip to Disneyland, John. It’s the happiest place on earth.

Some golf professionals – I’m tired of seeing some of these guys hit a shot, get a sour look on their face as if someone just did something to their breakfast cereal and then we see the ball within 15 ft. of the hole. I know these guys expect more but for us mere mortals that’s a win and I for one am done with the frustrating, almost bored look some of these guys lay out for us. Enjoy the game boys and girls! (See Jerry Kelly and Matt Kuchar for examples of how to have fun whilst making big dollars playing a sport.)

Baseball bench clearing brawls – Now I use the term ‘brawl’ loosely because 98% of the time there is less fighting going on than one sees on Boxing Day at an electronics store. It looks like slow dance time at the prom more than fisticuffs. I’m tired of the lame jog in from the bull pen by players who want to throw pitches rather than punches.

Basketball – not the game but the time it takes for the last 30 seconds of a game to be played. Glaciers move quicker. During one NCAA game this spring I timed the last 30 seconds and it took 12 minutes of actual time for the clock to reach zero. It seems coaches have unlimited time outs and use each one of them every time a whistle blows.

Two time-outs per half and we might see the pace move faster than a tree sloth.

Now, time for a nap.